(17 hit OUCH) voyeurism hault, and for clarification [19 Nov 2007|01:53am] my name's jyoti- sort of said like jo-tea but with with the flare of a spicy tongue towards the "ti" part of my name. i am 19, indian, female, born in toronto, canada and raised on the west suburb outskirts of mississauga. i come from an upper-middle class family. i am straight though my friends question and even argue my sexual orientation. currently i pursue a postsecondary education at an art institute. this will be my last entry.

(1 hit OUCH) [18 Nov 2007|06:30pm] [ mood | down, i guess ] its hard to feel anything sometimes, especially working in a mall with extended hours where christmas music repeats and you can't walk without ten people brushing your shoulders. the worst is dealing with highschool students who get mummy and daddy to buy them slrs to pursue their dreams of becoming a photographer. its depressing to think i participate and encourage this pathetic reborn bourgeoisie generation. the truth of my identity and relation to these people makes me sad. it destroys my mind and it's impossible to create knowing that i am one of them. god everyone wants a digital frame for Christmas, kids coming in developing their shitty medium format. everyone looks the same, everyone tells the same story; my tongues slippin'- normally i am curious and attentive, and people eat me up, they drone on and on. prone to bursts of laughter in the middle of their soliloquy i wonder how, even for a second i would care. normally, i am curious and attentive

(12 hit OUCH) [17 Nov 2007|07:08pm] my sense of humour is off, and so i laugh at a lot of lee's jokes. coincidentally he posted this in his journal around the time i wanted to. if you look back a few entries you can see his beard photographed along with a set of teeth i found in the house. this video isn't funny, just priceless. he made another video of "things i want to do, but cannot" i decided not to post that out of consideration for his girlfriend evy.

(1 hit OUCH) [13 Nov 2007|10:35am] [ music | buttonhead- boys in the ball pool ] shivering bones, stomach that chruns, control-key out of control ps. dmitri fedosseev's painting caught my eye in one of megan's facebook invites. i would buy it if i had the money. he as well as megan sinnett will exhibit at youngromantics gallery opening on nov29th? come if you can. 1313a queenstreet west.

(13 hit OUCH) peepshow [11 Nov 2007|10:12am] ( UNDRESS )

(1 hit OUCH) #1 [10 Nov 2007|10:34am] i don't appreciate it when my loyalty/honesty is questioned.

(11 hit OUCH) like a bird [07 Nov 2007|12:41pm] a first year at ocad was talking about making out with his boyfriend in the stinky dirty boys washroom in the annex building. while they were kissing he found a piece of spinach in his mouth, and put it in his partners mouth. his partner, horrified, yells "ah what are you doing!" and the boy replies "feeding you, like a bird". i though it was pretty weird so i began laughing and repeating his words, thinking how fucked up that would be if a guy did that to me. as he finished the story he picked up a strangers tim horton's half empty coffee from the table and takes a few sips. oh, the people i meet.

(14 hit OUCH) dates [07 Nov 2007|01:49am] locust @ reverb nov 14th zeroes @ the drake nov. 17th nous sommes loups @ sneaks dec 8th still waiting for nervous sleepers to play another show, if ever. in drawing we got into groups and critiqued the classes work. When we reached my drawing i didn't tell anyone it was mine because i wanted to hear honest responses. while one of the members of the group really liked it, the other two disapproved. one girl said "it looks like the artist barfed into the white space" and i laughed because it's true. the point of a discussion is so you get feedback to improve your work, not so you can get on a high horse and feel good. i wish people were as honest with me as i am with them.

(OUCH) status update / extend the 25 [06 Nov 2007|03:44pm] loving you like the capture of a ghost, impossible. who am i kidding. just, who am i kidding? sucking on thumbs and j's, biting nails, and this headache roars through the empty shell of my mind, echoing forever. dry throat, words lost in the pit of my stomach. fuck verbal diarrhea, my mouth won't even open. sitting here in this hollow house, hands on my eyes as if to stop the fantasies of- ah ah ah! let's not even go there. naive girl, little brown skinned babe, count the lines you cross.

(4 hit OUCH) [05 Nov 2007|11:39pm] david was helping me with my cyborg essay, but suddenly decided my thesis is wrong & argued. oh, critical david. exclusive cyborg party soon.

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